The Cult of Parenthood

Perhaps this is not the best time to write this as I'm a little more than annoyed. I just had (yet again) "the talk" from someone about how someday, I will probably want children. It doesn't matter if the talk is from someone who already has kids or just wants them someday, its always the same lecture.

Oddly enough, this all started from a talk about the last book of the Twilight series. (For those how haven't read the last book & hate spoilers, I'd stop reading now.) Like so many women I know, this person has the Twilight addiction. I don't want to spend too much time talking about Twilight, but I'll simply say this. Yes, its crappy writing. However there is something horribly addictive about it & once you start reading, you have a hard time not finishing the series.

Anyways, back to the point of this blog. We were discussing how the main character Bella gets pregnant in the last book. I was describing the point in the book where I was so disgusted with her character that I threw the book across the room (& couldn't look at it for a few days). She gets pregnant with this half vampire child. Despite the pleas from her loved ones, she insist on keeping the little parasitic thing that is slowly killing her.

For me, a person who has no absolute desire to have children, this was just too much. The thought of being pregnant to me is akin to having a parasite (or to make or more hyperbolic, an alien embryo like from the Alien movies). Something that will slowly eat me alive and once it emerges, will destroy my life as I know it.

Before anyone gets too horribly offended, I think its perfectly fine for others to want or have kids. I can on some small abstract level respect the desire to raise a child. However I'm talking about my body here. About my life. I'll admit things could change for me & perhaps someday I may decide to raise a family. However, I view that as likely as me becoming a devote, born-again, conservative christian. As likely that I'll becoming a stay at home mom after marrying some misogynist asshole who I'll completely submit too. Not bloody likely.

What pissing me off right now is that whenever I get into a discussion about my lack of a desire to have kids with someone who does or already has them, it's like talking to person in a cult. They seem to have no respect for my desire to not have children & will not rest till they try to convince me that I'll "probably change my mind". Even after I tried to ask this person as politely as I could that I didn't need to hear the lecture again, as I had heard it many times before, she just continued. The only way I could get her to desist with the conversation was to walk away.

This is what gets me every time. Even though I admitted I might change my mind, they seem incapable of respecting my current wishes. I do not need to be converted to the cult of parenthood. I simply want people to respect my choices in life as I respect theirs. Even if it seems I'm being disrespectful in this blog, please understand that this is me ranting. I do respect people decisions to raise families or to simply want children. However I do not appreciate people ignoring my feelings with the caveat of "oh, someday you'll understand."